wife: is there anything else we should know about this house?
husband: we might be putting down an offer
realtor: ...well, yes *sigh* this house...
realtor: it's on a premier dog-walking path. name a breed. it walks right past this house.
wife: that sounds great!
realtor: it's an overwhelming number of dogs. even dog-lovers say "yeah, this is too many dogs. i no longer like dogs"
realtor: oh boy, here come a bunch now! hold on to your sanity
*some dogs arrive*
*husband and wife surrounded by dogs and very happy*
husband: TAKE OUR MONEY! TAKE IT!
It’s probably like one of those tower defense games. This was just the first wave. Just you wait until the 20th wave.
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So it's been 25 years since Dookie?
This was my first cassette. It was blue. I listened to it on a Radio Shack tap… https://t.co/uyE3C6mTWS
I 👏 CAN'T 👏 STOP 👏 BUYING 👏 PILLOWS
I shouldn't have restarted my Jack Ryan watching right before bed. This particular episode is slightly intense.
*hears the sounds of a garbage truck coming down the street in the morning*
me (leaping out of bed): AHHHH, HOLY C… https://t.co/DORegpAuhi