man (doing dishes): one day, i'm going to have a dishwasher and it will be amazing. no more hand washing for me
man (imagining having a dishwasher): oh man! oh man! i can't wait!
man (now surrounded by dishes): whoops, just fell behind with the dishes
One of the few things that can reproduce faster than rabbits are dishes.
When I moved into an apartment that had a dishwasher, my life instantly became better. Still gotta clean the pots and pans by hand, but I’m ok with that now!
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So it's been 25 years since Dookie?
This was my first cassette. It was blue. I listened to it on a Radio Shack tap… https://t.co/uyE3C6mTWS
I 👏 CAN'T 👏 STOP 👏 BUYING 👏 PILLOWS
I shouldn't have restarted my Jack Ryan watching right before bed. This particular episode is slightly intense.
*hears the sounds of a garbage truck coming down the street in the morning*
me (leaping out of bed): AHHHH, HOLY C… https://t.co/DORegpAuhi