Don’t worry, Google Analytics isn’t anything like this.

This comic was inspired by a conversation I had with my pal-friend Mr. Jason Poland over there at Robbie and Bobby.

Are you feeling adventurous?  Click this link right here and you will be transported to a totally random Robbie and Bobby comic.  Make sure you have a good grip on the adventure zipline before heading over!

↓ Transcript
green: lemme show you around google analytics. it's great for tracking data about the visitors to your site
blue: ok! cool!

green: looks like you have a lot of returning visitors today! see?
*blue is wearing a shirt that says i put stuff on the internet*

green: and 71% of your visitors said a nice thing to someone today. your readers are pretty nice people!
blue: ye- what?

blue: i don't know about this... it's a little too creepy
green: it's just standard website tracking stuff

green: it even has realtime tracking. you have 42 people on your site right now. see 'em?
blue: that's pretty cool! i guess this isn't too bad

green: two of them just laughed out loud at your funny content! awesome! here are the pics of them laughing
blue: turn this off now