green: i finally got a touchscreen smartphone! you gotta teach me how to use it!
orange: first off, be sure to not accidentally tou-
green: craaaap! i just made the screen all weird! help me!
orange: urg, give me that phone so that i can never give it back to you. you aren't ready.
green: i AM ready! i'm not going to let you take my phone! this phone is mine! *boop*
green: whoops. just texted everyone a picture i don't remember taking...
green (handing phone to orange): take it from me. i'm in way over my head here.
Touchscreen phones are dangerous in the hands of people not used to them. Lesson one seriously is “You’re about to accidentally touch the screen. Don’t do that.” Lesson two is involves actually using the phone.
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I must find a Monster Energy dealer in Paris ASAP.
Oh crap, I have some new albums to listen to right now.